Advice: Get more mail

There are four things you can do to receive more mail on the Cafe:

  1. Post Photos: Profiles with photos are viewed 10 times more often than those without (and thus get more mail!). Members are more comfortable writing to someone they can put a face to and having your photos posted demonstrates your commitment to finding a healthy relationship with someone new.
  2. Complete Your Profile: Answering the written answer questions allows members to get to know you better, and provides them ideas when writing you.
  3. Send mail: Those who send mail receive mail in return. Start by introducing yourself or saying hello to someone new today .
  4. Use the forums: Taking part in forum discussions introduces you to many, many more members and will provide ample opportunity to connect.

Post Photos

Members with photos posted receive up to ten times the mail than profiles without any photos posted. Profiles without photos tend to be skipped over when members perform a search.

The reasons for this vary, but the main one is simply that people like to put a face to a name. It makes things more personalized and you feel like you are actually writing to someone on the other end and not just typing into the void.

When you submit your photos, we will give you an three extra days, too!

So, it is a big disadvantage to not have a photo on your profile. If you need assistance, send us your photos via our contact form.

Complete Your Profile

The Edit button in the written answers section of your profile allow you to add or edit any answers on your profile. Your profile is your first impression to others. Your written answers let others know what's important to you and allow you to show a bit of your creative side too. If you have a hobby you really enjoy or if you really want to travel to a certain place, consider adding this to your profile. It provides others with ideas when writing to you, and shows your depth of personality.

Add a question or two to your profile which others might be able to answer for you. This will offer others the chance they may be looking for to write you.

For tips on writing ideas please see How to write a more appealing profile.

Send Mail

You know the expression, "Tis better to give than receive". It is just as true when looking for a mate online. If you want to receive more mail, particularly from those who interest you, the best way is to send mail. Sadly, some members log a profile, and then send little or no mail at all. They then wonder why others are connecting while they are not. They rarely see the 'new mail' sign flashing. The answer is simple: those who send more mail, receive more and greatly increase their chances of making special connections.

Start by performing a search to find those of interest, then view a profile by clicking on the username or photo of a match and then send them a message. It's free to contact others while there is time in your account, so don't be shy: all members are waiting to receive more mail.

When you write others, be sure to read their profiles so that your letters to them are more personalized. Ask a question or two about them which they can answer for you. This will show you took the time and will increase the number of replies you receive.

When you receive mail, be courteous and write back. This will in turn mean even more mail for you.

Use the Forums

The forums are a great place to connect and fellowship with others. Find discussions on just about any topic: Dating advice and questions, Travel, Current Events, Music, Praise and Prayer, Theology, and more. Enjoy the fellowship and camaraderie of the Cafe! Members who use the forums regularly report a more enjoyable experience. Plus, it'll expose you to many, many more members with whom to connect.

Posting photos to your profile, ensuring you have a completed profile, and writing mail to others can make the world of difference and will enhance your experience immensely. Try it and see for yourself!