How we use our time can significantly contribute to the quality of our lives. In this article, Dr. Jim discusses three areas where we can improve how our time is spent: Online, Worrying, Dating.
How do you spend your time? Time is a very valuable commodity and one that cannot be recaptured. You have choices of how you will spend your time. As you wake up in the morning, what is your first thought? Okay, after having a cup of coffee.
Many singles cannot wait to rush to their computers to see if there is a message. Are you suffering from power dating? This does not have to be a message from a lost love or someone who is interested. It can be just a habit and allowing the time on the computer to hopefully fill a deeper void. I spend a lot of time on the computer and with many emails. I know how easily one can slip into being consumed by it.
Stop and evaluate your time spent at the computer (for personal reasons) and question if it is a healthy use of your time.
One last thought in this area. Have you allowed the computer to become like a TV and just fill in the time? Give it a rest and set out to make new discoveries that can add quality and excitement to your life.
Others spend their time worrying. Matthew 6:34 tells us:
‘Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.’
I realize that these are very troubling times for many. There is plenty to be concerned about on the world stage. However, it is the personal worries that capture many. Worry feeds worry. It is a vicious cycle. Just telling oneself to not worry seldom accomplishes the task. Worry must be replaced with hope and trust. Many single adults feel like they do not have anyone to trust and have lost hope. Past experiences can contribute mightily to worry. I suggest that a simple yet powerful beginning to turn about most worries is to:
- focus on God by reading His Word and absorbing His promises;
- count the blessings that God has already provided; and,
- purposely set out to fill your day taking small steps toward the place you would like to be. If this approach does not soon bring hope to replace your worry, then find someone to share your concerns. This can be a pastor, counsellor, or mature Christian friend. God will provide someone. How can I be sure of this? I am here for you!
There are many other areas where one can waste their time. I would like to address one more that applies to many single adults who are dating. Many attempt to date before they are really ready to date. Their past experiences have not processed to a healthy point. They choose instead to try to ‘act out’ their problems and are like a contagious disease. Wherever they go they spread pain and harm. The human condition does not allow us to arrive at perfection, but this does not excuse addressing the challenging areas before acting them out in the lives of others. One is really wasting his or her time who does this, as well as wasting the time of others and leaving a trail of hurts. You may find some ‘temporary’ fixes. But that is all that you will accomplish. Increase your opportunity for success in relationships by taking the time to heal in a healthy way.
Life is a collection of minutes and choices. Are you wasting yours? I challenge you to rise above the temptations and live in peace and joy.