Reality can be distorted by our views of ourselves and the world. How can we prevent ourselves from falling into the trap of illusions and distortion that can interfere with our lives? Steps can be taken to get back to reality and heal ourselves in the process. Singles will then realize that the ‘real thing’ is much better than any mirage.
Reality – Are you chasing a mirage? Part III
Part I Are you chasing a mirage? Part I showed how our lives can often find us in the desert. There is much that can be gained from such an experience. Part II Illusion – Are you chasing a mirage? Part II illustrated how we can allow some of our attention to become so strong that things can become like a mirage and become an unhealthy force over our lives.
False image of reality
A mirage is never a true and accurate picture. It is a false image and can take on such force that it becomes a false god. If you find yourself in such a place, here are some suggestions to find the road back to reality and health:
1. Accept the distortion as not being a true picture of reality. If you have sinned during this time of ‘illusion’ confess it to God and accept His forgiveness. Confession also includes repentance – a turning away from this activity.
2. Set time aside to spend with God and invite His Spirit to flow through you. Ask Him to reveal the truth to you and to confirm His love. Listen to His voice as He guides you to walk closely with Him in a true and real way.
3. I can still recall the counselling session before my divorce and the words of the counsellor saying that I had a character problem. What? But I am a Pastor! How true her words turned out to be. Very often I find that God leads us to the desert so that our character flaw(s) become obvious to us. It sometimes takes years for us to arrive at a point of seeing these flaws and then even years more until we are motivated enough to make the change. May I make a suggestion? Why fight it? It is totally for your own good. I recommend that you look at paragraph 5 for an excellent source to help guide you to the discovery and the solution.
4. Perhaps the most destructive force in the lives of single adults is the propensity to isolate. There is something about us wanting to withdraw and handle things on our own. Perhaps it is our pride and we do not want others to know that we are not so ‘perfect’. God instilled within us the need to belong and to commune with others. Every person needs a ‘buddy.’ You will find me saying this over and over in my articles. Pray about finding one or two Christians of your own gender to develop a strong buddy system. This should include doing things together that are fun, encouraging each other to grow in God and holding each other accountable. A buddy who truly cares for you will be able to sound an alarm when a ‘mirage’ appears in your life.
5. If you find the forces of the past or present to be overwhelming and you cannot find the place to start your trip to reality, I encourage you to find a Christian counsellor or a pastor trained in counselling. My life has greatly benefited from the guidance of a counsellor during times of my mirages.
The Real Thing Is Much Better.
God wants you to walk in truth and power – His power. Do not let Satan and other forces rob you from the joy that God wants you to experience. Ask God to guide your steps to wisdom, joy and peace. It is not always the easiest path, but it always the most fulfilling and one built on a solid foundation. The ‘real thing’ is much better than any mirage.
Dr. Jim
Author of “Guide to Successful Online Christian Dating”
John 8:32 ‘Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.’
Good article. Now where are the available men? (Those w/o hang-ups, baggage, illnesses, anger, disease-free)