Here are some quick online dating etiquette tips for you online daters. You may read them and think these are common knowledge but you would be surprised how many online daters do not follow them.
Be honest in your profile! Some online daters like to “inflate” their height, salary or the amount of hair on their head, or “deflate” their weight or age, all to make themselves seem a bit more ‘enhanced’. So, yes, it’s dishonest, but also once you do go out on that first date, it will all come crashing down on you anyway. Think about it: Why would anyone want to date someone who is dishonest from the get go? What will they be like for the rest of the relationship? Oh, and doing so really wastes everyone’s time.
Post Recent Photos
This is basically a subset of the “Honesty” argument above. Post photos of what you actually look like now — not how you you did 5 years ago. Sure, you want to use flattering photos (good lighting, looking upbeat and positive, etc.), but that doesn’t mean inaccurate photos. And don’t bust out your Photoshop skills either. Some say, “this is the most recent photo I have”. Really? In the day in age of smartphone cameras? I’m guessing between you and your friends you can easily come up with a few photos quite quickly. The next time you’re out and about, have your friend, roommate, or family member take a few photos of you. Of all the photos you post to your profile, make at least one a full body shot. Sorry, had to be said.
Make Each Message Unique
Those of you who send the same standard copy/paste message to everyone you write to? Your odds will greatly improve when you make each message unique and relate-able to the profile of the person you’re writing to. See our tips on Writing Your First Message for more on that. Ask them something about what’s written in their profile – i.e. show interest in them (instead of just “Hey!”).
Respond to All Messages
This point some will argue against, but I feel it’s a good one to adhere to: Respond to all messages, even those from whom you are not interested in. That doesn’t mean you have to continue to engage with someone who you know you’re not attracted to. It simply means sending a courtesy “Thanks for your message, but I don’t feel there’s a match here” type message. I’ve read that, for some, when they send a similar type message that the recipient will sometimes take that as a cue to continue writing. I believe you’re ‘ok’ to make use of the block option if such a situation occurs.
Be On Time For Your Date
The online communication has gone well and you’ve decided to meet in a safe, public and mutually-agreed upon location. Great! Now, make a good first impression and show up on time. Worst case, have the other person’s mobile number so you can send them a quick text if you’re stuck in traffic or transit is running behind schedule.
Follow Up After Your Date
If the date went well, I assume you would get in touch and say so (really – say so!). If it didn’t go quite so well, I would still recommend you send a quick note (via the dating site, email, text, whatever) just saying that you don’t feel there’s a match and best of luck. Then, everyone knows where they stand and can continue on.
When It’s Serious, Remove Your Dating Profile
Things are going really well? Nice! Once you feel you’re ‘exclusive’ definitely take down your dating profile (a lot of dating sites have a ‘hide’ feature if you’re not totally sure). This shows you’re serious about the person you’re seeing. Wouldn’t you expect the same from the other person? Thought so.
What Do You Think?
Let us know in the comments what you think about these online dating etiquette tips. Do you agree with them? Do you follow them? What online dating etiquette would you add?